Vayetzei: Leas journey through motherhood

Lea teaches us a tremendous lesson through her journey in motherhood. When she became pregnant with her firstborn, she was in a deeply bitter state. Her relationship with her husband was complicated, marked by mutual resentment, and she felt profoundly unloved. This emotional turmoil is reflected in the names she gave her children. In the Torah, a child’s name is never chosen at random. Names are intentional, often mirroring the parent’s spiritual or emotional state at the time of birth.

When Lea gave birth to her first son, she named him Reuven, “For God has seen (ra’ah) my suffering.” His name comes from the Hebrew root meaning “to see,” and reveals her belief that God saw her misery and responded with a child. Her mindset is clear—she is consumed by her pain and projecting her suffering onto the naming of her child.

She then gave birth to a second son, Shimon, from the root meaning “to hear.” Lea said, “God has heard that I am hated.” Her perspective remains pessimistic, still focused on what she lacks.

With her third son, Levi, nothing has changed: “Maybe now my husband will become attached (yilaveh) to me.” Lea continues to yearn for the love she does not receive, hoping that yet another child will finally secure her husband’s affection.

After the birth of her third child, Lea struggled to conceive again. But when she was finally blessed with a fourth son, the narrative shifted entirely. She named him Yehuda, saying, “This time I will thank God.” Something profound changed within her at that moment. Lea no longer lived in self-pity or felt sorry for herself. Instead, she recognized the blessings she already had. She thought, in essence: I have children. I am deeply blessed. I will focus on what I do have rather than on what I lack.

Lea chose gratitude—and everything changed.

After Yehuda, she gave birth to Yissachar, a name rooted in the idea of reward. This reveals a spiritual truth: after sincere gratitude comes great reward, for nothing is more beloved to God than a heart that chooses to be grateful.

Next came Zevulun, meaning exalted dwelling. And then her final sons were Gad and Asher. Gad means good fortune, and Asher means abundance, joy, or prosperity. Through these names, we see the transformation that occurs when a person embraces gratitude.

Once Lea shifted her inner world from bitterness to appreciation, her life began to rise in every direction. Her emotional state—first clouded with pain—became brightened with blessing, and this change is reflected in the very names of her children. Her first three sons were named during a period of sorrow; the rest were named from a place of positivity, clarity, and hope.

After gratitude came reward, good fortune, joy, and prosperity.
Her change of mind changed everything.

Through the names Lea gave to her children, we gain a window into the journey she walked throughout her life. In the beginning, she was upset, bitter, and drowning in self-pity. But eventually, she chose to rewrite her narrative. She let go of what she could not change and focused on what she could—her mindset. Though she accepted that her relationship with her husband was far from ideal, she began to feel profoundly grateful for her children. She stopped taking them for granted and recognized how blessed she was to bring such bright souls into the world.

She shifted her focus from what she lacked to what she had. Her mind stepped out of victimhood. She began to appreciate every blessing—and from that moment, her entire life began to expand.

The same is true for us. Gratitude is the elixir of life. When we treat it as daily medicine, it has the power to heal, uplift, and radically transform. Every one of us has areas of life that feel painful or disappointing—circumstances we wish were different, situations that can easily make us miserable and bitter. But alongside the struggle, each of us is overwhelmingly blessed. Despite hardship, every person can find countless reasons to be grateful.

And it is precisely when we choose gratitude over complaining, appreciation over self-pity, that real change begins.

We can remain bitter about what we cannot control—or we can choose to rewrite our narrative. We can shift our attention to the abundance already present, rather than the lack that frustrates us. When we do, reward awaits. A life of exalted dwelling, good fortune, prosperity, and joy stands on the other side of gratitude.

Gratitude is a daily choice—a conscious decision to acknowledge and deeply appreciate the good that surrounds us. And as we do, our entire lives begin to change.

Like Lea, we are invited to step away from bitterness over what is missing and embrace radical gratitude for what is already ours.